When I was a about 5 or 6 years old, I fell over and hurt my head. It had a big gash down the middle and was bleeding a lot. My mum heard me fall and came running upstairs to see me covered in blood sobbing and very scared. She called my dad, and they took me to the hospital where I had a head x-ray. The Doctor showed me the pictures, assured mum, and dad I was fine, gave them some things to watch out for and then sent us all off home. Despite the fact it was well into the night by this point because I had been “so brave” dad stopped at a garage and got me a chocolate bar to reward my bravery.
I was 15 when my uncle died, the first loss I had experienced, and I was devastated. My parents were divorced, and I was with my dad when I found out. I began to cry. He had no idea what to do with me so, to “cheer me up,” he took me to McDonalds. I was allowed a LARGE big Mac meal with a chocolate shake and a hot apple pie MY FAVOURITE!!! Whilst it certainly didn’t cure my grief, I did stop crying and felt comforted by the enormous meal I consumed.
When I passed my GCSEs with flying colours, my mum and stepdad took me out to celebrate. We went to a posh restaurant, got all dressed up and had a massive 3 course meal. I felt really special and affirmed in my achievements.
Whether scared, sad, or happy, food is often the go to strategy for dealing with our emotions. Many people find that a chocolate bar, sweets, trip to a favourite fast-food place, or a drink and a bun regulate or affirm their emotions. This often stems from our childhoods where we have been rewarded or consoled with food. As a mum of 3, I know that I have done this with my children. Something is bothering one of the kids, drink, bun, and chat. They have achieved something amazing, meal out of their choice. But this can create negative coping mechanisms moving forwards and a problem with emotional eating.
Emotional eating refers to the behaviour of consuming food to cope with, or regulate emotions, rather than in response to actual hunger. People who engage in emotional eating often turn to food to soothe negative feelings, reduce stress, alleviate boredom, or even celebrate positive emotions. This can lead to overeating and, in some cases unhealthy eating habits and coping mechanisms.
Social and cultural influences often connect celebrations and gatherings with food, and this can begin to condition us to believe that certain emotions need to be dealt with through food.
Foods high in sugar and fat can trigger the release of “feel-good” chemicals like dopamine in the brain. This creates a temporary sense of pleasure and reward, which may lead to a desire to eat more in response to emotional cues.
The problem is that we then get trapped in a negative feedback cycle. Negative emotions lead to emotional eating, which leads to guilt or shame, which leads to more emotional eating and so on and so forth! With food being a readily available and socially acceptable way to manage discomfort, we can neglect to develop effective, positive coping mechanisms for dealing with our emotions.
So how do we address emotional eating? Well, beginning with being aware of your emotions and whether you are eating because you’re hungry or because you are feeling something is a great start. Food journaling can really help with this. Tracking what you eat and how you feel before and after can help identify patterns of behaviour and make you more mindful so you can look for alternative strategies to manage your emotions.
Healthy eating habits too can support you to focus on balanced and nutritious meals, eating mindfully and savouring the flavours and textures of your food, meaning that you are less likely to engage in emotional eating in the long run. And of course, it is always important to seek professional help if emotional eating is causing significant distress or interfering with your life. Therapists, counsellors, and registered dieticians specialising in emotional eating and behaviour change can help you to break the negative cycles and regain a positive relationship with food.
Whilst eating will always be something that we do socially and will continue to be used by society as a way of bringing people together, it is important that we don’t use it as an emotional crutch which brings us feelings of shame or guilt. Food is there to be enjoyed, but more than anything, it is also a vital way to fuel your body for health and wellbeing. Whilst I still tend to revert back to emotional eating in times of extreme negative emotions, and I still love a good family gathering for a special occasion with a buffet and my cousins tiramisu, my journey has unravelled many of the negative coping mechanisms I had which involved food. Food is not my go to strategy anymore. This has been a journey and an experience which was well supported by my nutrition club. For that support and guidance, I am eternally grateful to my nutrition coaches who have seen me through to being a “Healthy New Me”.

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